Birthday blues

In one of the minority of my songs where the words are more important than the music, I wrote the following lyric eight years ago.

There was a time when the sky was grey
And nothing seemed to go your way
That was the time when hope withdrew
And friends faded from your view
The word was out that your shares were down
No wonder you always wore a frown
You thought that nothing could go right
You'd struggle hard but would lose the fight

Take a breath and look around
Smell the breeze and hear the sound
Of rustling wind and birds in trees
Life's not as bad as you think it seems
Take your chances one by one
Make your winnings as they come
See the possibilities
In living as you choose to please

Times change, options arise
Go forth and take life on a high

This is the year when your dreams come true
When worries vanish like the morning dew
This is the year when it all works out
When finally you can banish doubt
This is the year for having fun
When you show the world all the work you've done
This is the year you reach your goal
When you claim the prize and redeem your soul

Of course, the 'you' of the song is me. Maybe there were some years in which the final verse was relevant, but these days I feel as if I've reverted to the existence defined in the first verse. This certainly isn't the year for having fun, I didn't get the chance to show the world all the work I've done, I didn't reach my goal and I definitely did not claim the prize. Maybe I have redeemed my soul because after all, I am a good person and I have done many good things.

Leaving aside the geopolitics of the past month and year, this has been a very hot summer and we still have another month and a half to go before more temperate weather will arrive. I find the constant heat (most days between 32°C and 36°C at 12 pm) extremely debilitating and I postpone my evening walk until 7 pm, when the sun is lower in the sky although it's still around 30°C.

I am 68 years old today. I should update the description of this blog to "I'm not 68 years old, but rather 22 years old with 46 years' experience". I was making some notes for a new song a week ago, "when I was young, I had the future planned ….. nothing has turned out the way I expected, not much has turned out the way I had wanted". But at the moment I can't achieve the mental state required for writing lyrics. I also don't have any music. 

I'm not grumpy; it's just the constant heat that is reducing my mental capacity.

Healthwise I'm fine as is my wife, but the health of three close family members is worrying, thus taking a hefty mental price from us.

I logged into GMail this morning and noticed balloons floating across my profile picture!

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This day in history:

Blog #	Date	Title	Tags
273	03/08/2010	Tuna mousse	Cooking
746	03/08/2014	Kindle problems	Kindle
1329	03/08/2020	Musicians that I have heard of who share my birthday	Personal
1522	03/08/2022	My life as multiples of 11	Personal
1650	03/08/2023	67 years old!	Personal
1651	03/08/2023	Middle England, and Israeli partition	Israel, Personal